Should I try to make contact with my old best friend?
Long story short, I grew up with this kid from preschool to 6th grade. In 6th grade, he started chasing after a girl that he had a crush on. So while we used to work out together in the fitness center at my old church, he slowly started spending that time trying to get to know her friends and thus get closer to her. Literally leaving me running alone on the treadmill.
The pain of the betrayal stung me for quite a few years… and still haunts me to this day (its been 9 years). However, the last time I saw him, about a year or 2 ago, he would not stop staring at me from a distance. I tried adding him on Facebook once, he accepted it. But in the personal message of my friend request I wrote “Its been awhile. How’s life treating you?” and he didn’t pop anything back. So I removed him feeling kinda hurt.
He’s in the “popular” group, and seems sort of happy where he is. But why did he stare at me? Why would he accept my friend request if he didn’t want to talk to me? I want to talk to him, express the pain that I’ve had of his “betrayal” back then.. and I want to try to mend our old friendship. He was a great guy back then…
So, in your opinion should I get on his Facebook again and send him a message asking him if he wants to hang out? Or should I just give it up and move on with my life? (Though the pain has last 9 years… I guess I’d just have to deal with it?)
For those that can’t tell by my pic… Yes, I’m a girl.
Ramesh Klinkert answers:
Are you a girl?
If yes, then move on. If you have a crush on him, you could try to befriend him a bit.
If you’re a guy, sure. There’s no harm in doing it.
I know I’m sexist. But that’s just the way things are, no matter how much you think that it aint.
He’s in love with someone else?
please read the whole thing
We first met about a year ago over the Summer at a fitness camp, and I took an interest to him because I thought he was one of the only cute guys there. So a friend of mine decided to make friends with him to help me out with my little crush. She told me how nice he was, and that we’d get along great. One day after doing our warm ups on the tennis court, we called out for me to wait up. He then told me that he thought I was very pretty. I said thank you and felt very flattered. Soon after, we found each other on Facebook, and we talked CONSTANTLY. I liked him a lot (not LOVED) and we talked more and more in real life. We were able to laugh, joke, and we told each other everything. He was one of the best friends I had ever had. We stayed friends when the school year began, and I would ALWAYS talk about him to my friends, about how great and nice he was (but not that I liked him) and I became very close with one of my girl friends. Later on, I confessed to her that I had had a HUGE crush on him since the day we met, and since she is very protective of me, she said she wanted to meet him. I introduced them the next day, and they got along OK. So that night, he and I talked on Facebook, and he asks if he can tell me a secret. And I say, sure. He tells me that he fell in love instantly with my friend when I introduced them, and that he thought she was beautiful. I said the typical things like “aww, that’s so cute.” even though my heart sank to my stomach when I read it. He asked me if I thought he should ask her out. I, of course, being a huge dumb idiot, said yes. What am I gonna say about my friend? “No, she’s a ***** take me instead!” of course not. I love my friends. So the next week, she is at my house, and she confesses to me that she also likes the guy I am in love with. And we agreed not to act on our feelings so that the other wouldn’t get hurt. Well, he went to her and asked her out ( in a huge, public setting, I was there) and she began to cry and said yes. I almost started to cry so I walked away. She thinks that there is nothing wrong, and we are still friends..but I am still EXTREMELY close to him and am finding it harder and harder to not act on my feelings. Yesterday, we went to the library, and we walked outside together because it was hot inside, and sat on a bench. He leaned his head on my shoulder and said he was so glad I was his friend. (Also, recently he told me that he used to like me when we first me, which was when I liked him, but now he sees me as a friend) My eyes watered up from sadness when he said this, and when he asked why I just said I was glad to have him too. I am completely in love with this guy, and I don’t know what to do. I know you may say it is just young love, or lust, or whatever, but these feelings won’t go away. I’d had boyfriends before meeting him, but no one has EVER made me feel as good as he does. Every day, I get sadder and sadder to see him with her. I don’t know what to do. Please help.
Ramesh Klinkert answers:
Whoa, like the same thing happened to me!
My best friend’s name was Bella and the guy I really liked was my best guy friend named Adam!
She was like..in love with him after two months of meeting him and I’ve been in love with him since like…i’ve met him!
And OMG i was pissed when they were together but I never showed it…and they eventually went out.
I was like…PISSED. That was like in the sixth grade…
It’s freshman year now…and they broke up. And now me and HIM are going out!!!!!!
But the point was, i never left his side when they were together until they broke up.
I mean, if you think you really like him, you would wait for him to be available.
Cause girl, I waited for 4 years for him.!
And we’re together now!
So don’t forget about him! Just wait and see if he’s worth it!
He’s going to realize soon that it’s you he wants.
Good luck chickyy (:
How can I become motivated to do my workout routine? Also, I never seen to have energy, help!?
So I made a workout plan to prepare for P90X, because I’ve restarted p90x 2 times already. My workout plan is 1 month of cardio every other day and then 1 month of weight lifting. Then P90x. so after school I have a snack (or a meal haha, I have about 2 bowls of cereal) and then I start to get very sleepy and tired. Even when I move around I feel tired, then I end up taking a 3-4 hour nap! But after that nap I dont have much energy, unless I have coffee, but I can’t cause then I will stay up till like 2 am! I’m a high school student and my school starts at 8 and ends at 2:10.
So I need to know how to get motivated and how to have energy.
So there’s guys my age posting pictures of them all ripped and shirtless on Facebook. And I look at those picture and go wow, I wish I was that ripped. I’ve even had the picture on my iPad for motivation but then I end up deleting it cause I don’t want any accusations made about me, people dont go through my iPad (except family sometimes, and I don’t want them to think I swing that way)
Is that motivation bad? Having a guy my age shirtless and ripped on my iPad. (I honestly just look at the muscles, cause I feel like I’m obsessed with getting ripped, and big)
Ramesh Klinkert answers:
How to motivate yourself to exercise.
1. Do it with a friend.
Statistics tell us that people who exercise with a friend are more
successful at exercising consistently. You can keep each other
accountable. Knowing that someone is waiting for you to exercise with
them can be great motivation to show up and get it done!
2. Do exercising which you enjoy. For example, you find running
boring. You can replace it with any other cardio activity: roller
blading, playing badminton, tennis, bicycling burn a lot of
calories, and you feel more like you are having fun, than like you are
punishing yourself for that extra doughnut.
3. Choose music you like, dynamic and vigourous, to make it more
4. Check regularly with your clothes, see how they become bulkier,
whoop from joy, photograph the progress and create a photo gallery on
5. Set fitness goals, independent on weight loss. For example, say to
yourself “Next time, I will run quicker, and it will take me only ten
minutes to do so”, or such. You will feel like a real athlete,
preparing for a big day. Keep a journal of your athletic achievements.
6. Compete. Enrol into a local amateur tennis competition, for
example. This way, you will have a goal to achieve, which is different
from your weight loss, and you will have people to impress and you
will have to be adequate, so you’ll try harder.
7. Reward yourself (but not with food, you will end eating more than
you burned, and will become disillusioned quickly). Invent a set of
rules for yourself, for example: every time I am not feeling like
exercising, but do it, I will put 1 dollar in my piggy bank, every
time I achieve this or that goal – three. At the end of the month go
out and buy yourself the most impractical things you were craving but
denying yourself with this money.
8. Do not wait for some big moment or big day to start exercising.
There are spaces in your daily schedule when you procrastinate – fill
them with activities. For example, instead of sitting on the couch,
saying “It does not matter, I am going to the gym the next day”, get
off and do a series of push ups, or skip with the skipping rope (buy
it for one dollar in one dollar store), walk down the stairs at work
or around the block at your lunch break. This way, you are exercising,
fighting boredom, and do not have to sweat in the gym for hours
afterwards. This random 7-10 minutes activities will roll at the end
of the day into a full gym session!
9. Use “I will show them all” technique (sparingly). Think about the
mean people who teased you, the girl who refused to go out with you, a
sneering sales person in the clothes shop, imagine them all, and “show
them” – run fast, kick high, and end being and feeling gorgeous!
Pole dancing tell me what you think?
I know pole dancing started in a strip club but I don’t think its like that anymore. Is it that people are still ignorant about it or is it just … ‘stripperish’. I watch competitions and I was amazing and took a strong interest. I learned and became really good to. I even went to a strip club to watch the girls and they had nothing on the competitors. the strippers just pranced around the pole and was more seductive. I being harshly judged now because I like it and offered lessons. WHY DID I HAVE TO LIKE THIS SO MUCH?!
Ramesh Klinkert answers:
I think asking in all caps why you have to like this so much?! Is a bit dramatic LOL. Just deal with it and move on. My father couldn’t care less that I teach pole, but my mother is all up in arms about it since the day I took my first lesson. To the point that when my grandmother died, my ex-husband had to be the one to tell me because my aunt tried calling the number under my name and it was his, not mine. Come to find out mom was so ‘embarrased’ she’d changed the numbers because heaven forbid grandma call my cell and get the message “…and if you’re looking for more information on vertical fitness, please visit my facebook page at…” and grandma didn’t even have internet. *shakes her head* People will always be uptight and narrow minded about it. Just give up the idea that you can make people accept it and move on. I had to.
I NEED TO KNOW IF HE LIKES ME OR AM I JUST GOING CRAZY!!?
i’ve known this guy since the 8th grade and back then we were just friends then we started to get closer and he used to tell me i was pretty and like my pictures (through facebook) we were even brother and sister on Facebook. then we drifted and didn’t really speak again until this year when we had classes together. at first it was awkward because for some reason we weren’t speaking then we started warming up to each other. we have gym together and do this activity called fitness. I don’t exactly know how to explain it but its weird, but i like it. whenever we talk hes constantly smiling and i cant help but smile too. ive never been that way with a guy before and i hear that hes mostly shy with other girls. i always look forward to that class because i can really hang out with him but i get nervous. i feel like sometimes we’l be thinking the same thing because we will look at each other before were about to do an activity and we’ll both gesture to each other to come over to one or the other and sit next to each other (this happens when were not already near each other almost every time).
he’ll also do little things like playfully punch me, make fun of my name, joke around, and small things like that. (its the little things that i love!)
you should probably know that theres also this girl in our grade (slut) who sometimes goes over to him and massages him RIGHT IN CLASS IN FRONT OF EVERYONE! i just sit there like r u kidding me is this actually happening right now? and i assume that he thinks shes pretty and they might be friends but who knows. shes on my annoying list. i dont think he smiles like he does with me when hes with her though.
someone please help me!! i need advice!! i really like him and i dont know if im misreading the signs because i’ve liked him before and it went no where!
other things you should know:
*hes a HORRIBLE texter (one of those people that send 1 word texts or act like completely different people, he’s so much friendlier in person!)
*one of his friends might like me (but i most definitely don’t look at him in the same way and i try to brush him off)
Ramesh Klinkert answers:
Awww!! Well duuuhh he likes you!
best way to move on and have closure to the problem: flirt with him. And if you think you already are do more so. You obviously like him too so you know you want to:)
1) you could try something like, when you laugh, kinda stroke his arm and giggle at the same time
2) texting: one of my favorite lines, “so if i was with you right now what would we be doing?”
3) just keep eye contact and smile at him a lot. Kinda take baby steps forward to see what hes thinkin, andd win him over for sure!
Which should be easy, cause like i said, he likes you
btw, ignore that other kid that sent u a message about spelling. Hes an asshole.
Wanna lose some wight need help?
I dont know why I feel like my face is fat. Which is not like a big face nd stomach and legs skinny haha but I just feel like that. And today at my school a girl who I have a class with was like hey you are skinny which made me happy but then she was like but your face is ……….. I was like so you mean my face is fat and then she started laughing and said oh no I didn’t mean anythin like that
Plz any way to lose face fatness. I heard if you chew gum that helps you not gain face fat. Is it true or any other way plz help !! thanks
Ramesh Klinkert answers:
Unfortunately we can’t pin point where we want to lose weight. But we can reduce our bodyfat over all. It can be done one of two ways 1. Exercise 2. Nutrition
1.Make sure you do some cardio to get your heart rate up. So running, jump rope, walking etc. If you have access to a gym you can check out the free workouts on my fitness website below.
2. Watch what you are eating, stay away from greasy foods, sugary drinks, sodas, just stick to water with lemon. Also take out snacks, chips, and add more fruits and veggies. If you are eating healthy it may be because you are cosuming a lot of salt. Salt makes your body retain water, so you have bloated look or feel. To Flush away the salt from your body you must drink plenty of water!! No it wont make you more bloated, it will get rid of the swelling in any part of your body by flushing out the the toxins.
Check out my website for free workouts and nutrition tips, All i ask is to just “like” us on facebook. Good luck
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